An Expat Perspective
Hello friend, I’m Harper. I bet we’re pretty similar…I’m relentlessly pursuing how to hack this life to get the most out of it. You too? Cool. I bet we’re similarly junkies for joy and experiences and often think about the legacy we want to leave this world. We’re well-traveled and continue to add stamps to our passports at every opportunity. If you’re like me, you’ve chosen to partner with another human in this life whose career takes both of you abroad for years at a time. If you’re like me, this is incredibly new to you and you’ve made some incredible sacrifices to ride shotgun on this adventure. If you’re like me, you’re trying to make sense of what it really means to ride shotgun, maintain a sense of purpose, grow a meaningful career and foster your most important relationships across multiple time zones and bodies of water. Are we cut from the same cloth?
I’m a thirty-something millennial who loves technology, wine & food (separate or together) and animals. I’m a lifelong learner especially in the areas of empathy and psychology. I’ve had an incredibly rewarding career in the corporate world and achieved my goals early and often until the goals stopped meaning as much anymore. A global pandemic can change a person’s perspective and I was no different. 2020 shifted my life dramatically — an important relationship ended, I sold real estate, relocated to be closer to family and worked harder than any year prior in my career. The pandemic encouraged spending more time with people I care about and through that I met my person; my partner in this life. At the time I wasn’t thriving, barely treading water under a tidal wave of responsibility and stress at work. I made deep changes to my diet, sleep and lifestyle and just when I thought I might be regaining some illusion of control, my four-legged soulmate passed away. Cue the metamorphosis…is this what a mid-life crisis resembles? I took time away from work, reflected deeply, experienced deep shame for taking time off, grieved and made some difficult decisions. A dear friend at the time asked me ‘What makes you happy? You should do more of that.’ It hadn’t occurred to me that I had deprioritized myself for a very long time. I left my impressive post with a national company and moved to a different sector of work and never looked back. I decided work would no longer define me. I decided to invest in what brought me joy and meaning.
When my partner’s career responsibilities came calling, we were ready. We packed up and relocated to South America for what will be a few years of newness, adventure and high-def human experience. This will be the first move of many and though I’d lived abroad before, I questioned whether this was going to feel the same. Craving ‘preparedness’ I set out to find whatever was available to understand what this new role would entail. I came up sorely disappointed before relocating and even more so once we had arrived. The roller coaster of emotions that we’ve both felt embarking upon this expedition wasn’t anticipated and the resources or real human stories from the ‘front lines’ were tough to find and lacked depth.
So here we are. Reporting from the front lines of what I consider a completely new book or Act of my life’s story through evolving identities as an expat and trailing spouse with ambitions and a deep desire for purpose. If you’ll permit me, I’d like to share my raw observations and learnings, conversations with my fellow comrades in similar positions as I and hopefully ease the discomfort of treading through this unconventional, wildly wondrous and unique experience. Whether you’re currently experiencing an expat lifestyle, considering one or just along for the vicarious ride, I’m so glad you’re here.
Take good care.
Regards from abroad,
Harper.
Follow me on IG @regardsfromabroad
